The Brownies that Changed My Life
by AuthorName, AuthorTitle, AuthorMinistry
For eight years we ate together, slept at each other's houses, spent weekends hanging out - me and my buddies.
Then our activities began to include night clubs and drinking beer. My conscience would say, "I am doing such nonsense. When will I make a clean break for myself?"
Meanwhile, I completed my army service and reentered civilian life.
At a certain point I got tired of this double existence. On Friday night I would get drunk, and then on Shabbat I would go to the congregational worship service like a "butterfly". Each time I prayed and asked for forgiveness.
Then the moral situation around me got so low that I was physically nauseous at the things being done. I decided to stop associating with these friends. Not too long after, I fell from a ladder and could not work for months. It was a very tough time for me.
My old friends tried to get me to rejoin their partying and drinking lifestyle. When I refused they laughed at me, "What, you think you are really going to change?!"
After a particularly good worship time at the congregation, the guys called asking me to go out with them that night. As usual I declined. Then they showed up at my house at midnight. Something was not right in their eyes. They were drunk and something else besides. But they had brought brownies and I was hungry. We made tea. They gave me several brownie squares and could not stop laughing, but they promised the brownies were fine! I ate the brownies. Then they said, "That's it. You're in for it now."
They warned me not to let myself fall asleep. Soon I started hallucinating. I didn't know if I was awake or asleep. The "broken record" in my brain kept repeating itself again and again. Again and again. I went to look at myself in the bathroom mirror. The lights in my eyes had been turned off. I saw my soul go up while my body stayed put. I told my brother, "I am dying." I saw everything from above. I couldn't see the faces of my family. I could only hear them. My heart almost stopped.
All through that night I suffered. My mom phoned my so-called friends and yelled at them. My body convulsed as if jolted by electricity.
Then I saw it. I saw that I would one day stand and testify before people of how God rescued me. I prayed. I slept for 15 hours.
My friends laughed at me. They got a kick out of the way I talked incoherently after they drugged me. They had almost killed me but didn't seem to care.
After praying with Eitan and Avi later that week I told my ex-friends, "I prayed for you and forgave you even in the middle of the hallucinations. But I am taking an axe and cutting every root that connects us. I choose this day to live for God. I implore you to choose life because you never know when the end will come."
I did not file a complaint with the police.
All this happened over two years ago. I do not have anger in my heart. God showed me that I was living for the flesh. Since then I have chosen every day to live for Him. My life made a complete turnaround in every way. As part of this I devoted myself to serve the young adults at Tents of Mercy intensively.
Things began to change for the better in many ways. Soon after the brownie incident, I began working on a farm and seeking God daily. A believing family visited from Central Asia and happened to come see the farm where I was working. They had a beautiful daughter my age. We began an accelerated courtship, and today we are happily married!
Now I continue to pursue God's presence together with my wife. God is the foundation rock for us, and we are learning to rely on Him.
"You thought evil against me: but God turned it into good." (Genesis 50:20 DRA)
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